So today I spent Christmas with my bestie and her family which was fun and the food was delicious as always. I knew I would at some point interact with my ex-husband which didn't bother me but it did bring forward some unresolved emotions ( he still makes my heart flutter and I can never stop looking at him ) so much that I had to leave because that was my only way of dealing. As I walked home I was in deep thought and yet my emotions were confused but by the time I got home I realized that it was okay for me to feel the way I felt and that when I do it’s okay for me to leave and not to feel guilty because I could have stayed longer but I chose not too. Once I got home I released all of my emotions which felt good and I then sat on my front porch and smoked until I felt a chill then I went inside to movie watch.
I often wonder if I am the only person that no matter what still loves their ex and my only fear is that every guy I meet I will be comparing them to him but only time will tell if that happens.
What I have learned is how to express myself in my written words and I go into 2024 with a renewed passion for life and adventures.
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